Friday, December 3, 2010

Kid Labels

I've written before about mommy labels, but lately I've been thinking about the labels we all put on our kids. I mean, we try not to. But we do.

For example, Baby Boy K is the somewhat socially-awkward, book-smart, marching-to-his-own-drum type. While Baby Boy B is the social, physically advanced (probably going to be athletic), smart in a figure-out-how-to-do-things way, sweet and mean at the same time, and flirty one. This is how we see them. I mean, it is how they act right now at age 4 years and 22 months.

While these labels aren't overtly negative, I really fear placing the kids in a box. While basic personality doesn't tend to change, we all learn and grow and change to certain degrees. Growing up I felt like I was trapped by others' perceptions of me, having to be a certain way because that is how other people thought of me. I don't want that to happen to my kids, if I can help it.

While I'm very much guilty of using these labels (which isn't always a bad thing), I try to counter act them by paying attention to and pointing out when they do things that don't fall into those labels. For example, I try to brag on Baby Boy B when he does or says something "smart". I try to encourage Kaden when he interacts well with other children. I love that Kaden is not a follower, but I try to encourage him to some times go along with his playmates in whatever they want to do.

Somehow there has to be a balance between showcasing their natural strengths and talents and also encouraging them to be open to new experiences.

What are the labels stuck on your kids? Do you try to combat the labels in any way?